Recently, I read a blog called Incognizance and Linux, which sparked some discussion between friends about “Don’t Ask to Ask”, and whether or not it is rude/good etiquette/discouraging.
In this blog we will explore all points raised, and come to some conclusion and solution that takes into account all viewpoints and (hopefully) ensures each side (the asker and the asked) feels heard.
The Problem
“Don’t Ask to Ask” is a statement uttered by individuals participating in question/answer type communities (which we’ll refer to as “The asked” from this point forward) which addresses a desire by the asked for “the asker” (the person asking a question to the asked) to properly formulate their query before presenting their question to the asked. (An example of what I’m talking about can be found at “Don’t Ask to Ask”.)
The “Don’t Ask to Ask” website is often linked so that the asked doesn’t have to repeat their desire to be asked a well thought out question.
The tone of the “Don’t Ask to Ask” website is an angry tone, which has material and historical reasoning. The tone comes from a resentment of askers who have burned many of the asked in these servers in the past. For example, some askers have been malicious or lazy later on in a discussion where the asked is providing unpaid, volunteered labour in order to help the asker.
Asking to ask often causes nobody to reply to the asker, leaving the asker feeling ignored by the community of helpers. The reason they are ignored is because, helpers in these communities don’t want to commit themselves to answering a question that they might not be able to answer; therefore, they do not reply at all. They have limited energy to volunteer their help, and so will only speak to askers if they feel they are definitely able to help them.
The Counter-Argument
It could be argued, that linking that website, or telling someone not to ask to ask, can be a form of “Second Guessing”. Second guessing is defined as to anticipate or predict (someone’s actions or thoughts) by guesswork. It assumes that the asker doesn’t already know about how to form better questions i.e. it assumes they are being maliciously lazy by asking a question that is not fully formed.
Their true intentions, motivations, or ability to form questions in a way that the askers of the community they’re in prefer, are unknown by the asked. This is second guessing certain qualities about the asker, which should’ve been worked out before the asked sent the link.
For example, the asker could be in the mindset that “asking to ask” is the polite thing to do.
In addition, directly sending this link as soon as the asker asks the question (for example) “Anyone know about Linux?”, could make the asker feel like they’re currently in a hostile environment, surrounded by dismissive people. This could therefore cause their desire to learn Linux to decrease. They may even leave the server and quit learning about Linux right there and then, assuming that the community must be hostile.
Finally, Incognizance and Linux postulates that the asker may not even know what they need to know in order to ask the question properly e.g. “How many times have you had the following happen? A person joins your community and makes a post asking about how to get their WiFi working on Linux. They are new to Linux and they have an .exe file they downloaded somewhere from the internet.”
In this way, the asked should not assume that the asker hasn’t done their proper research, as they wouldn’t even know what they are supposed to be researching in order to properly formulate their question.
What Should Be Done
There are two issues here: on one side, the asked who sends this link or phrase, is expressing their assumption that the asker is more often than not, not putting in their due dilligence or effort in order to properly form a question.
On the other side, the asker might not know that they are supposed to know something in order to properly formulate the question, they may be under the assumption that it’s impolite to directly ask their fully formulated question, and being so direct about question etiquette may cause them to be discouraged, and quit learning about what they’re trying to learn about.
There are many solutions to both problems that I will list here:
- The asked should step lightly when guiding users to proper question etiquette, maybe telling a user something like “Hello! A lot of people here know about Linux, if you post your question and some thing’s you’ve tried already to remedy your issue, someone who knows about Linux will probably be happy to help you out!” - This solution will address the problems on both sides of the equation; both the askers etiquette and the asked’s desire to see fully formulated questions before committing to helping a user.
- There could be a different website other than the “Don’t Ask To Ask” website, which is linked instead. The new website should reflect the tone in solution #1.
- Similarly, solution #2 could be an embed instead of a website link.